Today, I had the experience of meeting two people who I
never expected to meet, and I knew within a few minutes what a profound connection
it was.
Tony and I took the girls to the mall this afternoon because
we “owed” Rachel a shopping trip since all she wanted for her birthday was some
new clothes. After she picked out some things, Tony and the girls headed one
way, and I went to Macy’s. We made plans to meet later in the center
of the lower level of the mall.
I finished before they did, and I settled into a comfy chair
for some people watching. Because what better place to people watch than at a
mall, right? (Well, a bar is probably better, but I hate bars). Right away, I
noticed a young couple snuggling on the couch across from the chair I was
sitting on. The girl obviously had Down Syndrome, and the young man was eating
a giant colorful swirly sucker and had his arm around the girl, her head laid
on his shoulder. A few seconds after I sat down, he looked at me, smiled, and
said hello. I said hello back, and he told me that he was trying to see how
many licks it would take to finish his sucker. He seemed quite proud to tell me
that he was NOT going to bite it at all.
He clearly had some mental challenges, but I thought he was
so cute. He quickly introduced me to the girl he was with as his girlfriend Drea,
and he asked my name. All it took for
him to start chattering away at me was the smile I gave him when he said how he
was going to lick his sucker away.
I will back track a bit because it really is important to
this story.
For the past few years, I have been reading a series of
books by Richard Paul Evans. The series began with The Walk and is about a man
whose wife dies due to a horse riding accident. Within a short time, he loses
his business and his home. He then sells everything he owns and decides to walk
from his home in Seattle to Key West. The story is about the people he meets on
his walk and how they, and his journey, help him begin to heal from his
tragedy. This past spring, the 4th installment of the series, A Step
of Faith, was released, and I read the entire book on a rainy Sunday. I love
the books, and unfortunately, I have to wait until next May when the final book in
the series is published to see how it all ends.
Last spring, I spent a morning having breakfast with Richard
Paul Evans when he was in St. Louis for a couple of days; my boss is good
friends with him and invited me. He is fascinating, a compelling storyteller,
and I could have talked and listened to him all day. He talked about how he
prepares and researches for each new book by actually driving the same routes
that his character walks in them. He stops in little towns and big cities, eats
in local restaurants and diners, visits out of the way tourist attractions, stays
in hotels, and he uses much of what he encounters as characters and places and
stories in his books. He does make some things up, but now, as I read them, I
wonder what is real and what is fictional. He has certainly met some
interesting folks during his travels, and I said that to him at one point. He replied something to the effect of, "We all do if we just open our eyes and ears and pay attention." After talking to him that morning, I
vowed to myself that I was going to take the time to be more aware of the
people I meet as I go about my life-- more interested in talking to random
strangers I encounter. I have done a pretty good job of that, but there have
also been times when I have mentally kicked myself later for not taking more
time to talk to someone and hear their story. Let’s face it, there are some
fascinating people out there in the world if we only take the time to get to
know them, even if only for a few minutes. Everyone has a story, and not only
do I love telling stories, but I love hearing them too. I think I love hearing
them more than I love telling them.
This yarn has unraveled into a messy heap, so I will now
start to wind it up into a neat little ball and get back to the couple I met
this afternoon at the mall and how their path crossing mine came at the perfect
time.
I ended up moving from my chair over to the couch next to
them because the young man, Sebastian, was talking in such a soft voice that I could
barely hear him. He said to me right away, “I guess you can probably tell that
I am not right in the head.” He was totally serious and said it with a twinkle
in his eye and a genuine smile on his face. I said nothing, (what do you say to
something like that?) and he went on to tell me his story. He has Asperger’s,
and when he was 17, (he is now 24) he was hit by a car when he was crossing a
busy street and suffered severe brain damage. He told me all about how he went
by helicopter to Children’s Hospital and that he had three broken ribs, a
broken neck, a broken leg, and a head injury, and he had to relearn how to do
everything. After he introduced me to Drea, I asked them how long she had been his girlfriend and
where they had met. He told me they met where they work, at a place called
Boone Center, Incorporated, a business not far from here that employees
handicapped people who aren’t able to obtain traditional jobs.
The more I talked to this delightful couple, the more I wanted to talk to them, the more of
their story I genuinely wanted to hear. I learned that they met because
Sebastian came to her rescue one day when another worker was throwing empty boxes
at her. He intervened and made the person stop, and according to her, it was love
at first sight. She also told me that she had a boyfriend before Sebastian, but
he “played girls and broke with me.” That is not a typo, she said, “broke with
me.” As she said that, he hugged her, and she laid her head on his shoulder. I
asked how long they had been boyfriend and girlfriend, and he said many years,
she said three. They were just so darn adorable.
They held hands, smiled at each other, and me, constantly. Sebastian told me
how after his accident, he lost all of his friends. Drea replied, “but I am his best friend now.” So
sweet…everything about them was just so sweet.
What really struck me though was when Sebastian leaned over
and told me that he LOVES his life, he has a great life, and he is thankful to
God every day for the life he has. He
was so sincere, and I could tell that he was not just saying those words for
the sake of saying them—it was clear to me that he truly meant every word he
spoke. I thought about his parents, who must have been so terrified when their 17 year old son was lying in the hospital broken and battered, and how blessed they must feel that he is alive and well and loving his life in spite of the challenges and difficulties they have faced and will continue to face.
I would have been perfectly content to talk with them for the rest of
the afternoon, but Rachel called and asked me to meet her at American Eagle to
look at some shorts she wanted to buy. Drea leaned over and asked if she could
give me a hug when I told them I needed to leave, and I know I had more than a few
tears threatening to fall. I hugged her and told her and Sebastian how much I
had enjoyed meeting and talking to them. Sebastian thanked me more than once
for talking to them, and said, “You are so nice, and if you want, I will go buy
you a sucker!” J
To roll up the yarn ball a little bit tighter and weave the
loose ends of this story into it, I walked away from them feeling so fortunate to
have been able to meet them. I couldn’t help but think of the whole encounter
as a kick in my ass. I’ve been in such a funk and so unhappy with some of the
turns and twists my life has taken, but as I walked away from that delightful
couple who thinks, no believes, that life could not be better
and they are so blessed, I wondered, not for the first time, how I can even
think of having a pity party for myself, no matter what problems I have or what
things are going on that I think are too much for me to handle. How can I when
this young couple sincerely believes they have a great life and are blessed by
God when they both face challenges and hurdles every day that I know nothing
about and can’t imagine dealing with. I am so glad I chose to go to Macys to
look at food processors rather than go to Champs with Tony and the girls to
look at running shoes.
It was a very humbling experience, and meeting them has strengthened
my resolve to not let any opportunity to meet, talk and learn someone’s story
pass me by. And, I know that I will not soon forget Sebastian and Drea.
